This spring, I had a visit from my beloved aunt, who found a flyer in the local paper for a house-and-garden store, and thought we might take a little “road trip”. I agreed, but with the complete understanding that it was for purposes of browsing only. No money of mine was to be spent! So, off we went…

Auntie: “Oh look! That little gargoyle would be so cute in your yard.”

Me: “No money of mine will be spent!”

Auntie: “Oh look! You could turn this big fake stone flower pot upside down to disguise your wellhead, and the tray could be put on top of it to function as a bird bath!”

Me: “No money of mine will be spent!”

Auntie: “Oh look! These containers hold seeds and fertilizer. All you have to do is sprinkle the contents, and water it daily, and you will have beautiful flowers.”

Me: “No money of mine will be spent!”

Auntie: “It says here that this one is guaranteed to attract butterflies, and the other one will attract hummingbirds.”

Me: “I’ll go get a cart.”

So, $50 later, we wheeled out Jermaine the Gargoyle, one large imitation stone planter, and enough seeds to attract every flower-loving airborne creature in the Northeast! I selected a few rocks from the 18 billion in my yard, and built a circle around the wellhead, installed the makeshift birdbath, filled in the circle with dirt, planted the seed, and put Jermaine right in the middle of it all. I watered, weeded, danced around the stone circle under the full moon, and on the Summer Solstice, I arose at dawn to ensure that Jermaine’s nose would be pointing directly into the rays of the rising sun. Sure enough, I eventually had fragrant flowers, beautiful butterflies, happy hummers, and bathing beauties. In spite of the fact that my Auntie forced me to do it, my money was well spent!

Now let’s just recap, shall we? A gargoyle to ward off evil spirits, sitting in the center of a stone-like pool of life-giving liquid, surrounded by nature (both flora and fauna), and all of it encapsulated with a circle of natural stone. I call it….

PegHenge.